The Sports Page

“The sports page”, is a game master and I play. It is my least favorite game of all time, I have never actually won.
I read at least four newspapers a day but I skip every single sports page (in all fairness I skip the entertainment/celebrity page as well but he doesn’t seem to care about that). I even skip magazine features about any sport. It’s not like I I don’t like to play, I enjoy actual exercise (I run and swim and do yoga) but something about sports being an actual industry doesn’t agree with me. I understand its validity, I just cant adhere to it.
Anyhow, when he found out about my sports page skipping habit, he started to insist that I read it every day. To encourage that he decided that at the end of each week he would ask me questions from the sports page while I was tied up, naked and spread wide open.
If I answer correctly, I get nothing. But if I answer incorrectly, I get caned on the bottoms of my feet. Moreover, for every wrong answer he puts one clamp anywhere he wants on my body.
He makes a list of the questions I answer incorrectly and I have to write down the correct answer fifty times each. This is my least favorite part, it is mind numbing work and I cant help think with every stroke of the pen that it is futile.

Despite his “encouragement”, I continue to skip the sports page. I try to outsmart him by reading sports highlights on Friday evening (we usually “play” on Friday night) but I can hardly ever remember anything because I read only the headlines and am absolutely not interested in knowing who’s playing whom in what and who won.
I suppose that is why my performance in the test is so poor, last Friday I got six out of fifteen questions, thanks to that I had to run on bleeding soles.

I am truly at my wit’s end.
How does one get interested in something they don’t care about? I know he’s only trying to make me more aware and learn things and that is something I hold above all else, so why am I unable to simply obey?

30 Days of Kink: Day 2

(I changed my mind, I decided to really put 30 days into doing this, mostly because it is the harder thing to do. Also, because I feel focusing on one question at a time would enable more detailed answers)

Click here for Day 1.

DAY 2 : YOUR KINKS.
List your Kinks. Describes what it is about being Dominant or submissive that excites and arouses you the most.

Ha ha, list your kinks. I feel like the person who designed this questionnaire was really concerned about it being accessible to the “masses”. Still, maybe fetishes would be a better word than “kinks”, not more accurate just better.

Here’s a list of my kinks:
1. I love being slapped, on the face.
2. I love being tied up, really uncomfortably.
3. I love being in pain. In any way (whips, floggers, rope, chains etc) and in any form (physical, emotional, mental).
4. I greatly enjoy humiliation, especially laughter.
5. I enjoy edge-play.
6. I love blood.
7. I love the harsh-reality treatment. And uncomfortable questions. And confronting difficult truths, not just about myself, even the world in general.
8. I love watching others in pain or in the throes of a mental conflict, a serious dilemma or tragic heartbreak.
9. I love all things metal. Choke-chains, piercings, knives, blades, handcuffs.
10. I love orgasm control and denial.
11. I like pee.
12. I like verbal abuse, not necessarily profanity just things that sting.
13. I like breath control.
I think that’s enough for now.

As for what about being a submissive excites and arouses me most.. I think I will start with my issues with that question, using the words “excite” and “arouse” implies that the only aspect of BDSM being concerned with is the physical and the sexual, one could just as easily use the word “love” or even “enjoy” to make the question a little more open-ended.

I like not being in control, at all. I like not having to concern my mind with what to do so that I am free to think way past the realm of immediate action. I enjoy the helplessness that comes with the lack of control. I have been helpless a few times in my life, but a literal take on the word makes me feel the metaphor is really not hard to deal with.
One is truly helpless when they are strapped down at all limbs and gagged and cuffed and blindfolded and unable to move at all, one is truly at the mercy of the perpetrator but one is not helpless when they have to make difficult decisions in life. Then, one is just faced with hard to make choices. Really losing control helps me keep the distinction clear.

Click here for Day 3