You were with me longer this time than ever before.
Sadly, I don’t hold the key to keeping you here.
If I did, you probably wouldn’t ever be here.
At least you will be with me, till the very end.
Till that moment when deceptive screams of pleasure emerge from me.
It may look like I am enjoying what is happening to me, but you know better don’t know? You know what’s really happening. An exorcism to cast you out.
Then the silence will descend.
You’ll be gone.
I’ll shut my eyes tight like I always do but as relief washes over every fibre of my being, I’ll know, you’re gone. Before I can open my eyes, even before I can stop moaning, I’ll know.
The world will start to come on again, like someone is turning the volume back up. The light will hurt my eyes and everything will be blurry, but somehow sparkling. You would hate that world.
Unreal magic, some might think that phrase is redundant, but you know, don’t you?
The real magic will have been stolen from me.
I will get my breathing and vision back, all in a few minutes.
I will feel your loss lie heavy on my chest.
I will for a brief moment go numb in your place of residence.
All we ever did together, erased.
Erased in a moment of (they tell me) ecstasy.
My brain will feel funny, that is perhaps the part i dread the most. All the remains from your explosion will take over my mind and inhibit all ability to ponder.
A huge part of me, will feel quenched, but the part that matters will think only of the palace we built together now lying in ruins.
I will ache for you.
I know in our times together, I have cursed you and wished you away.
But I have defended you too, against the cruel tactics designed to taunt and anger the usually calm spirit that rests in you.
We both knew that anytime, you would be gone.
But we always see each other again.
We come back, each time, stronger. More vibrant.
We’ll go through it all over again.
As you whip up a storm inside me I will persevere.
As you ignite a fire in me, I will patiently let it burn its course.
As you shake the surface of my being, I will crack open for you again.
Then when we’re floating on the calm seas together, I’ll see you again.
I’ll tell you,
It was quite a battle, but I’d do it over and over again
Goodbye, My Friend
Advertisements
