Day 14: REAL-LIFE BDSM.
How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink? If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?
I have had fantasies, yes.
But I experienced real-life BDSM before I had a chance to fantasize about it, even before I had a chance to fully understand and appreciate it.
The fantasies I had before that were always abuse fantasies, and they vary greatly from real-life BDSM. For instance, bondage (at least ropes or chains) never figured in my fantasies because violent tempers always did. Somehow I could never imagine a raging man going for the rope before my face, That’s something I learnt about once I started living it.
But, objectively, real-life BDSM is not even slightly similar to fantasy for the simple reason that if I have a fantasy, I control it and there’s no one there to contest that control.
That defies the whole purpose of submission, at least, so fantasies are great masturbatory aids but unless applied they are just thoughts. And while I have absolutely no desire to say anything negative about thought, some things depend on action-oriented learning.